I am really not sure where to start this week. But I guess sex sells so let’s take a look at www.CrystalHarris.com just another beautiful woman from the world of Playboy, Inc. Run by 85 year old Hugh Hefner. I have to say, I am professionally (note the word professional) disappointed that there is no blatant nudity on this website. I mean, if she really was Miss December 2009, there should be some naked pictures right? Well I am not sure if it is related but maybe that’s why they aren’t getting married.

Yes indeed sports fans (Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue fans that is…) For some reason, according to Hef’s twitter account, http://twitter.com/#!/hughhefner it appears that she called it off. And according to website it is confirmed. My theory is very simple. She was in it for the money. He lied to her and said you can have it all when I croak. Well, the wedding was supposed to be this Sunday and the papers weren’t signed sealed or delivered yet. He kept on pushing it off until she finally said, “um, listen you old man. If there is no money in this deal then I am not interested. So he says, ok – how about 10 million or some other very low amount compared to the hundreds of millions he has in the bank. She says no – I want more. He says – I have 4 kids from previous marriages and they deserve it – not you, you 25 year old little girl who would be nothing if it weren’t for me. You would be working at McDonalds or as a prostitute. I am giving you a chance of a lifetime. She said it wasn’t enough and calls it off. So I will leave it up to you my friends. Who is dumb and who is dumber. Well Hello – She obviously is the idiot. Now she won’t get a cent and he will just buy off the next one that comes along that says – I will be your concubine. Done.

By the way, if you are dealing with an older man or a younger woman, you will need to get this app for your iphone: http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/f301234b78/the-playboy-app-with-crystal-harris?playlist=featured_videos

Speaking of sex scandals, did you hear that Arnold Schwarzenegger’s lover / mistress Mildred Baena is the one who spilled the beans? http://www.hellomagazine.com/celebrities/201106145607/mildred-baena-arnold-schwarzenegger-lovechild/ Hello magazine got the scoop and obviously paid the most money for the story.

But sometimes we only hear one side of the story. That is why I subscribe to Funny Or Die – To get the full story about Anthony Weiner, check this out: http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/cfcad11d17/a-public-statement-from-anthony-weiner-s-penis?rel=player&playlist=featured_videos

I also get my news from another very reliable source. After Robert Diaz’ granddaughter outed him in New York Magazine, http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2011/06/diaz.html , I turned to the Onion News Network for more information on the issue… http://www.theonion.com/video/antigay-senators-horse-affair-caught-on-tape,20707/

Finally, I know some of you are only here for the sports I write about. But you have to admit that sex and politics and idiots are also interesting. After all, inquiring minds want to know… how to market themselves. As for basketball fans everywhere except Miami Florida, please join us at the parade in Dallas to celebrate the Mavericks beating the Heat. It should be fun, but traffic is gonna be tough so be prepared… http://www.star-telegram.com/2011/06/14/3152666/250000-fans-expected-for-dallas.html

Happy Father’s Day everyone. I hope the news stories and scandals above teach us all lessons. Lessons on how to use the media, twitter, youtube and everything else at our simple disposal. I mean the real message here is to keep it in your pants. And if you can’t do that, get paid for it. And if you can’t do that, don’t flaunt it to the world with the click of a mouse. Geez people. Do you really need to hire SalemGlobal to manage your business as well as your personal affairs? Well, ok… but its going to cost you Call Raphi Salem at 212-222-3292 or email him at info@salemglobal.com for more info.